Monday, January 07, 2008

There's no crying in electoral politics!

"Victor Sells Out" is a pretty apolitical blog. My take on showcasing my political views is that it's about the equivalent of posting lurid pictures of myself in a thong. In the end some might be supportive of me, some might be disappointed with me, some would have preferred I didn't share it, and basically in the end, despite all the awkwardness, probably nothing will have really changed. It's only when the politics absurdly spill over into the realm of the pop culture (i.e. Larry Craig's mens room hijinks or the guy from Orleans being elected to congress) that I may throw in my two cents on the issue. Aside from that, it's the usual, rambling post about some esoteric minutiae in my life.

So, don't consider this an endorsement or a condemnation of any particular issue or candidate (lest I unfairly give that all important "Victor Sells Out" endorsement boost to certain candidates) but merely an observation when I say, "Hillary, what's with the near crying?" Someone running for president can make numerous gaffes, but aside from engaging in extra-marital monkey business, or being associated with people with mental health issues, crying has got to be one of the worst things you can do.

When people are looking for the next President of the country, they're generally looking for someone who can keep it together. If some horrific national disaster strikes, or we're plunged into war (again), or if terrorists have hijacked Air Force One, or we have to send a team of rag tag astronauts to blow up a doomsday meteorite, the one thing the President has got to do is keep it together; if not behind closed doors but at least when addressing the press and the American people. Say what you will about Bush, but at the very least he kept it together (perhaps even a bit suspiciously too together) from when he first heard the news to when he addressed the nation on that frantic Tuesday in September. So yeah, when you're starting to well up because the polls may be indicating your campaign isn't going so well, it's not sending a good message. She's also not going to get a lot of sympathy from a state that prides itself on being a bit of a bad ass with the whole "live free or DIE" state motto (in contrast New Jersey has the incredibly trite and lame "liberty and prosperity").

Did I also forget to mention that she's carrying the historic burden of becoming the first woman president and she just played into a major anti-feminist stereotype? It'd be like if she showed up to the next debate with an apron on and asked that before the debates started she'd distribute fresh baked brownies for all the other democratic candidates. You're Hillary freaking Clinton, you were probably the first first lady since Eleanor Roosevelt to have done stuff outside of picking the curtains for the White House, you gotta be tougher than that.

In conclusion, I think Hillary done fucked up. Whether this'll be a minor blip that'll fade into obscurity or it's the kind of minor issue that snowballs and derails entire campaigns a la Howard Dean, only the coming weeks will tell. My suggestion, Hillary should immediately schedule a press conference and then punch the first reporter that makes eye contact with her, that's how you do it in prison when you want to show everyone right off the bat you're hard. I think voters in a state known as "the Granite State" who until recently worshiped some sort of pagan mountain god will appreciate that kind of hardness.

Now to go back to writing about which Darren was better on Bewitched.


  1. yeah. she's fucked. plus huckabee has god and chuck norris behind him. "what do i think about our underfunded education system and never-ending drug problem?" [roundhouse kick to the face] "next question."

  2. Actually crying is OK now. Why do you think all them Redskin pussies kept giving it up.

  3. she won't make that mistake again. next week she's going to have that last little bit of emotion taken out...maybe get rid of the tear ducts just to be safe.